NYC Parking

I've been wanting to write this blog for about a week now.

The other day while trying to park my parent's car in the city on street sweeping day, I realized something I thought was profound.

I was walking to get the car with a cup of steaming coffee in my hand when I realized that there was an empty spot up the street a little ways...

I began to run, spilling hot coffee everywhere, my heart stressfully beating...

When I hopped in the car and sped forward half a block, I realized that there was a fire hydrant...it wasn't a free spot after all.

It was then that I realized that I had prayed for a spot that morning and that the spot God intended to give to me, would not be one that I had to loose my peace over (heart palpatations and coffee spills). I could sit back and listen to the radio and enjoy the rest of my hot coffee while waiting for my answered prayer. It might take longer than I wanted or expected, but I had prayed for provision and so I was determined to wait for it.

As I drove around my neighborhood again and again, I felt like the Lord began to open my eyes up to certain situations happening all around me. One gentlemen decided that his big truck was going to fit into a spot the size of a smart car and I literally watched him for five minutes backing up and inching forward and backing up and inching forward and finally he began to ram into the car behind him pushing that car back so that he could squeeze in. I thought, "yup...some people step on others to get what they want, they push people around and aggressively go after what they believe they deserve."

I kept on driving beginning to become very amused. As I was driving up the hill, one woman sped up and cut in front of me just in time to find an open spot and steal it right out from under me. I thought, "Some people steal and take things from others in an attempt to get what they think they deserve."

I drove around for a very long time, observing the driving habits of others...the hoverers...the stealers, the aggressive bullies...

Getting my spot that morning definitely didn't look like what I thought it would like. It involved a couple of trips to the parking meter, a $45 ticket, and 2 hours I did not have to waste. But when it was all said and done, I got a spot directly in front of my apt building and felt the wisdom I'd attained was well worth it.

Oswald Chambers says,

“Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time.”

Oh Lord, may I be ever resting in your will for my life. It may not always make sense, but it is always what is best for me.

KSW

A Broken Heart in Chelsea

The other night I was walking home from my shoot at The Standard Hotel in the meatpacking district. I was feeling bad for myself because Orlando Bloom's publicist wouldn't let me photograph him at the private dinner I was covering for WWD. A photo of him and his supermodel girlfriend would have made the story.

I was stewing over the superficiality of the whole thing and how I couldn't wait to get home to my cozy home where I was comfortable...I was just about to the subway station when I looked up and saw a drawing on the side of a building that looked like a child had made. It was a picture of Jesus on the cross with a big broken heart. It wasn't subtle at all, Jesus was hanging on that cross and the most prominent part of the picture was His gigantic broken heart.

So often I picture Jesus annoyed. Annoyed at sin, betrayal, weakness, addiction, idolatry, etc...

Jesus doesn't get annoyed like that. He doesn't sit around looking at everyone thinking, "I can't wait to get home so I don't have to deal with their attitudes anymore." His heart breaks for them. Love oozes out of His every pore. He can't help but look at them with tear filled eyes longing for them to find freedom in relationship to Him. He quietly mourns for them and longs for them to find Truth.

I want to love like that.

Lord, let me love like that.

KSW

Clothed With Power

Lately, I have been noticing a trend. When I do things out of guilt, obligation, pity and pride it produces exhaustion, bitterness, brokenness, resentment and neediness. When I do things because my heart is full of love (The Holy Spirit), my cup is overflowing (The Holy Spirit), my time is freed up and Jesus has made a way (The Holy Spirit), it is effortless, rewarding, joyful, and anointed.

This morning I was reading the end of the gospel of Luke where Jesus is raised from the dead and appears to his disciples for the last time in the flesh. What He says to them before He returns to His Father in Heaven is so powerful!

Luke 24:49
"And behold, I am sending the promise of my Father upon you. But stay in the city until you are clothed with power from on high."

He's talking about the Holy Spirit! May I never leave the "city" again without Him.

KSW